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Some guy actually wed this chick: “Sometimes I say I’m married, sometimes I pretend I’m not”

October 2, 2014

So this is feminist marriage:

I’m philosophically opposed to what traditional marriage means, and I often take pains to explain that Aaron and I aren’t one of those Smug Marrieds. We got hitched on the fly for health insurance, and we are allowed to hook up with other people when one of us is out of town. To me, the term wife signifies to others that my adventures, sexual or otherwise, are over.  As Lauren put it, we “want to walk into that party as charismatic, sexual women,” and whether or not we plan to actually sleep with that cutie in the corner, “being a wife defangs that.” It also feels feminine in a way that irks her: “I’m happy to wear red lipstick,” she says, “but I don’t want to be anybody’s wife.”

So when I’m surrounded by single people, feminist activists, and/or some of my more irreverent friends, my husband becomes my “boo” or my “man-piece.” Instead of settling for vicarious Tindering, I’m free to tell stories of my actual Tinder date last Tuesday. I, too, roll my eyes about the wedding industrial complex, explaining that Aaron and I city-halled it. In these circles, referring to Aaron as my husband not only sounds like bragging, it also increasingly makes me an outlier; more than half of Americans are now single, and cohabitation has become an accepted alternative to matrimony.

Aaron, the “man-piece.”

Posted by Charlotte Allen


From → Uncategorized

One Comment
  1. you can bet that when she decides to divorce him, she will take him for half of what he’s worth. & that pathetic mangina will deserve it.

    my favorite line is “In these circles, referring to Aaron as my husband not only sounds like bragging,” it’s almost like they know how men don’t want to marry them & they still treat it like a joke.

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