The New York Times’s “modern man”: has “no use for a gun” but owns his own melon baller
At a “gun-free” campus operated by advanced-thinking “modern men”
Mmm, a man who knows my shoe size in every brand, prefers itsy-bitsy dainty “fillets” of beef to those crude 20-ounce T-bones, and owns his very own melon-baller! What more could a girl wish for?
And then, of course, there’s his softer side:
“20. On occasion, the modern man is the little spoon. Some nights, when he is feeling down or vulnerable, he needs an emotional and physical shield.”
“26. The modern man cries. He cries often.”
And he wouldn’t be writing for the New York Times if he didn’t possess this trait:
“25. The modern man has no use for a gun. He doesn’t own one, and he never will.”
But just because the “modern man” is a gun-free zone like Umpqua, that doesn’t mean he can’t be a knight in shining armor:
“16. The modern man lies on the side of the bed closer to the door. If an intruder gets in, he will try to fight him off, so that his wife has a chance to get away.”
Well, at least he tries. Run, wife, run!
Posted by Charlotte Allen